NEWS FROM SCOTLAND
Reports by Joe Murphy
Just back from a great weekend in London at the BICC ‘Moot’ and Epsom Show but more about this next week as I don’t have a lot of time to cover all the things that went on. However it is suffice to say that this has given Kevin and me a great ‘pick-me-up’ prior to the winter coming in and we are now both looking forward to the racing season next year. I had many conversations with fanciers over the weekend but one thing that everyone seems to enjoy is the ‘Joe’s Jokes’ feature with many fanciers’ wives reading them first to have a laugh, which is all good fun.
Attacked at Home
See attached photograph of the Strang partnership of Falkirk pigeon killed within the passageway of their loft. What an ending for this poor bird and to think that it had raced the past season and ended like this. You wonder if it is worth giving the birds freedom at this time of the year. I know that we never let the race team out after the last young bird race until prior to mating up next year. My thanks to Jock for sending me the photo and let us hope he does not have any more attacks.
Ayrshire North Road
News from Alfie Lawrence who along with his wife Margaret has organised a social evening on behalf of Ayrshire North Road Federation on Friday 14th November in Drongan Primary School in Drongan, Ayrshire. This will form a question and answer with the panel consisting of double International winners Mr and Mrs Geoff Cooper of Bath and one of Scotland’s top fanciers in recent years Davie Jamieson of East Calder. Tickets for the event are £10.00 each which includes supper and the ‘kick-off’ is at 19.30 prompt. If interested and require a ticket then contact Alfie on 07794041688 or Margaret on 07721081835. It should be a good night. There will also be a select draft of birds on offer from Geoff & Catherine Cooper, Mark Gilbert, Mark Sparey & David Jamieson plus others to fanciers so remember to take your wallet with you as you cannot go wrong purchasing birds from these quality fanciers. Looks like a good night so let us hope it goes well.
Geoff & Catherine pictured with Joe Murphy
Joe’s Joke
Before I give you this week’s joke I must let you read a letter I received from Mrs Rosemary Smith from Yorkshire who wrote: Dear Joe Murphy, I am not a pigeon fancier but an 80 year old pigeon widow!! My husband has kept pigeons almost all our married life. In 1960s I gained fame in his club by almost winning a race for him. He had to work on this particular Saturday afternoon and I was left in charge of the clock. For many years after, at the annual prize giving dinner, it was the favourite story that recounted ‘Rosemary clocking a winner for Stuart-which turned out to be a strag!’ However it is not pigeon stories I am writing about but you’re ‘Joe’s Jokes. I have MS and on a Friday morning I attend an exercise class run by the MS Society. For many years at the end of the class I sent them all home with a smile on their faces telling them a joke. We have friends in America who left here in the 1960s who have the same zany sense of humour as ourselves. I am not on the internet but for years they sent my daughter many good jokes to her computer at work. She is a Civil Servant and a couple of years ago the Government Departments cracked down on Civil Servants receiving private emails. When my stock of jokes ran out, my friends at the MS Exercise Class were very disappointed. Fortunately, my husband told me of your ‘Joe’s Joke’ in the British Homing World and once again I can send them home in a cheerful frame of mind. In fact, this week I have been asked to copy out the jokes for them to tell ‘THEIR’ friends too. I hope you do not mind me ‘stealing’ your jokes and rest assured that they are appreciated by my fellow MS sufferers, some of whom are in wheel chairs now. My very best wishes yours Rosemary Smith’. My thanks to Rosemary and her letter came at a very appropriate time as I had received a complaint (my first ever regarding the jokes) saying ‘I should keep my jokes to myself as they do nothing to enhance the BHW’. I know by the amount of people I speak to and letters like Rosemary’s above that these ‘jokes’ put a smile on people’s faces and that’s the reason I do this feature. Just to prove that people enjoy this, a fancier sent me this joke on the same day as Rosemary’s letter arrived. Enjoy, I thought it was hilarious.
Now to the joke...
Over a romantic anniversary dinner, an elderly couple reminisced about when they met 60 years earlier. ‘Do you remember’ asked the husband ‘How on our third date, we made love against the fence behind the country bus shelter?’ ‘How could I ever forget’ she smiled. With a mischievous glint in his eye, he said ‘What do you say we go back their tonight and recreate the moment for old time’s sake?’ ‘Oh, you are wicked!’ She laughed and grabbed her coat. They drove out to the bus shelter and parked by the side of the road, making the last few yards on foot with the aid of their walking sticks until they reached the fence. They stripped to the waist and leaned back against the fence and began to make love. Unbeknown to them both, a couple of policemen were parked up in their patrol car, overlooking the fence, and witnessed the amazing performance. The couple were thrashing about in a frenzy of passion for almost half an hour with the incredible energy of a couple half their ages, after which they both collapsed to the ground, exhausted. The policemen thought they had better check that they had come to no harm so they walked over to talk to them. ‘That was amazing! I’ve never imagined a couple of your age would enjoy such intense and prolonged lovemaking. You must have an amazing relationship, what is your secret?’ ‘There’s no secret’ panted the old man. ‘It’s just that when we first made love together against this fence, sixty years ago, it wasn’t electrified’.
Please continue to keep the news flowing: to Joe Murphy Mystical Rose Cottage 2 Flutorum Avenue Thornton by Kirkcaldy KY1 4BD or phone 01592 770331 or to my NEW EMAIL ADDRESS at;
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